OUR "BOTTOM 100" PITCH TO FORBES

You see a lot of poverty in New York City. We were reminded us this last night when we turned down a bum and he told us to go get in a car crash.

Right then and there, an idea was born: the Forbes "Bottom 100."

Or as we like to call it, THE DERELICTE CAMPAIGN.

That’s right, we're looking for the 100 least wealthy people in this country. This would be no small undertaking - scouring every major city in America for absolute rock bottom. We’re confident in the process to weed out the fughazis. For example, anyone with a shopping cart is automatically disqualified. Ditto for those with a musical instrument.

On the flip side, you get bonus points for every tooth that is missing.

We're holding an open casting call later this week for the cover of the magazine. We'll provide the garbage bag tuxedos.

Hands down, the early favorite is the guy we saw shitting on the West 4th St. subway platform last year.

We are immediately dropping this off at Forbes’ 5th Avenue headquarters just around the block and will let you know as soon as we are given the green light.